Under construction

I’m under construction. 

My plans to come home are under construction.

My life itinerary, in general, is under construction.

However, this post isn’t really about any of those. It’s purpose is:

A) To show my mom R. got a hair cut and has slightly cleaner pants than in other photos.

B) To post a few photos (good-bad-ugly) of R.’s new house in the country (Es Migjorn). 

It always irked me when blogs, especially blogs of expats in Europe, only posted nice photos of bicycles with bread in the baskets, old women leaning out creaky windows, and men playing chess in a park. People in Europe have armpits, too! (And old houses need LOTS of work. And sometimes frequently, the showers suck [hence, why you notice the armpits]).

Anyhoo. I hope this post shows you beautiful things, charming things, but with a dash of salt and a dose of reality. 

Let’s begin:

Cute little door. Amazing cut-out! (If you were to open it, you’d see lizards and centipedes). 


acaparador: a horder. The man who lived in this house pre-R. was a nut. He had accumulated over 4 tons of rusty metal, thousands of shards of broken glass, bits of plastic everywhere…just junk. This is, roughly, 1/8th of his sheeyit. 


Aerial photo courtesy of the roof of house number two on the property, which I refer to as (affectionately or unaffectionately, depending on the wind, you know) “The Chicken Coop


Oh, convenient! Here’s the roof of the Coop. See that blue? That’s the sky. Squint a little more; see the other blue? That’s the sea. See, you see the sea! The little chunk of land to the right (before the stone wall) is R.’s. This smells like potential to me!


This is the front of the Coop. It’s one of those images that photographs beautifully because the Mediterranean sun is kind to B-list photographers like myself. The green door, the blue sky, the red poppies, the yellow…mattresses (gross). 


Exhibit 6: Wild flowers (apparently, my summer theme). There are also some fruit trees (pears, apricots, etc), artichokes and onions on the property. In a few years, a green thumb could start a farm stand from this place!

ImageAnd, the man with short hair and less of beard than usual. (And a nice, new white bench that, like the tomb of King Tut, is burying LOTS of “treasures” found around the premises.)


So, that’s your tour! 
I’ll be back with bread baskets and bicycles soon because, let’s face it, that’s what The Americans love about The Europeans. 
Toodooloo, guapitos.

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